Tell me if this is true for you:
When you go on vacation, you often feel better and happier. You’re more relaxed and present. And your partner seems somehow…better too?
This is pretty common. We get into a new, amazing environment, when we travel. And that makes it super easy to think thoughts that we don’t think very much at home.
Thoughts like:
•this is so fun
•I love this
•I can’t wait to see what the day brings
•it’s so gorgeous here
•I love spending time with my husband
•I get to unwind and reconnect with my partner
These thoughts directly create our experience of our vacation. It’s not the Mediterranean Sea or the free time or the yummy food (even though yes, all of those things are pleasurable). But it’s really the mindset we have while on vacation that makes it all so enjoyable.
And that means that we can channel that vacay state of mind any time we want! We can bring vacation mode thoughts into our everyday lives.
What if instead of thinking, “Ugh, I hate when my husband wants to watch this annoying show” you were thinking, “I love spending time with my husband” – that would be a game changer, right?
What if instead of thinking, “I’m too tired to be intimate with him tonight” you were thinking, “I get to unwind and reconnect with him” – much more likely to lead to the intimacy you are lacking, yes?
If those thoughts seem unattainable to you now, I get it! Our brains get stuck in the rut of our default thinking, and it takes deliberate effort to make a shift.
Learning how to create those shifts is one of the most important skills I teach in Marriage MD. It’s my signature coaching framework designed to help women physicians create the connected, passionate marriages they desire. Click here to learn more!
